There can be no doubt that the revelation that Haggard is a gay drug fiend is quite hilarious. Indeed, making fun of this guy is just too easy, and one can hardly do a better job than has already, inadvertently, been done by those trying to minimize the impact of this incredible gift from fate. However, even as a vehement anti-gay mega church bullshitter Haggard and his ilk are really not very important. Their hateful diatribe regarding homosexuality, and morality in general, is simply the public face of a very common viewpoint. One might be tempted to think that, as the pastor of a large flock of sheeple, wankers like Haggard are particularly dangerous. However, this is not really true. They are nothing compared to loathsome pundits like Limbaugh or O’reilly. It is true that a lot of people are probably made more homophobic by the asinine drivel that is preached in the mega churches, but the same buy-bull-shit can be heard in thousands upon thousands of other smaller indoctrination centers around the country. Phelps, with his nonsensical “god hates fags” comedy routine would seem to be a direct threat to the liberties of homosexuals, but in reality he is just a sad old man with no real influence at all. Those people who stand with him would stand with anyone who told them what to do. They are typical sheeple; fools of no consequence. All of these shitgoblins are worthy of contempt, but at some level one has to feel sorry for them. How twisted must they be to rant on and on about things that don't affect them at all? In the case of Haggard, what internal hatred he must feel, to spend so much energy assailing that which he knows he is. In the words of a very wise man, I pity the fool.
A lot of normal people (atheists) sometimes say that they sort of understand the appeal of religion. The comfort it brings may be based on illusion but it can seem real just the same, and this tiny concession to the irrationality of believing in made up sky bastards helps us to understand the insanity of true believers. What then of the true believer who is denied any such comfort because his true nature as a human being is in direct conflict with the tenuous precepts of his duplicitous belief system? This way leads to mental torment of a particularly nasty variety: the self inflicted kind. Despite what the Christ punching religiots think, atheists are not automatically amused by the suffering of theists. In this particular case it is hard not to laugh. The intrinsic hypocrisy of religion in general has been beautifully revealed, as has the old adage that implies that the most vehement homophobes are probably as bent as a nine bob note themselves. Haggard has done us all a service by showcasing these truisms, but on a personal level his anguish brings me no pleasure. Ironically, some of his sheeple might even start to think that homosexuality is not wrong, if his brainwashing is powerful enough for them to still accept him. Either way, he must be frightfully ashamed, and probably even a hit of crystal meth and good asspounding will not be able to cheer him up.
Thus, I say to my fellow atheists that this hilarious event is an opportunity to demonstrate that we are not malicious lovers of schadenfreude. That being Godless does not mean we are uncharitable, and that even a loathsome bigot like Haggard can elicit sympathy on a personal level. Being without god does not in any way make us less kindly. On the contrary, since we must determine our own moral stance rather than have one arbitrarily handed to us, we own our actions in totality. We must take the blame for our transgressions, and similarly our more noble deeds must be acknowledged. This is one of the many ways that intellectual freedom, the ability and desire to think for oneself, and freedom from irrational dogmas make atheism the one true attitude.